How to be a star employee — without becoming a jerk

Before I went to business school, I thought most business leaders were jerks. I had very little direct experience with executives, so my impressions were formed mostly from their portrayal in popular culture – selfish bullies who delighted in tormenting other people and put their own success and wealth above any other considerations.  

Imagine my surprise when I discovered that my classmates in the Executive MBA program were mostly thoughtful, conscientious people who were committed to leading businesses that were good for all their stakeholders – investors, employees, and the community at large. In my work as an executive coach and consultant, I have continued to find that most of my clients are decent human beings trying hard to do their best in very demanding roles.

Nonetheless, there are indeed jerks in the workplace, some of them in very powerful roles. In recent years many companies have introduced a “No Jerks” rule. There are good reasons for such a rule. A recent article in The Economist summarized it well: “Toxic behavior is contagious: incivility and unpleasantness can quickly become norms if they pass unchecked. That is bad for retention and for reputation. It’s also just bad in itself.”

The problem is that sometimes jerks are also highly valuable contributors. A few years ago, I developed a model of the two ways leaders can get on their boss’s radar, which I shared in the Wall Street Journal. One is visibility — giving your boss a clear line of sight to your outstanding contributions. The second is maintenance — being the center of office drama and conflict. Here’s what the two dimensions look like:

In the bottom row are the low maintenance folks. If you’re Low maintenance, Low visibility, you’re invisible. You may be doing good work and you’re not causing problems, but your boss is unlikely to see you as a candidate for special attention. If you’re Low maintenance, High visibility, you’re a star. This is the magic formula. You’re making your boss’s life easier, not more complicated. 

The top row is where the jerks fall. If you’re High maintenance, Low visibility, you’re a pain in the neck. Your boss only hears about you when you’re stirring up trouble. This is a fast road to stagnation at best and job loss at worst.

For a boss, the greatest challenge is the High maintenance, High visibility employee. You are the proverbial “toxic rock stars.” You’re doing great work and your boss knows it. But you are also the center of drama and conflict in the office. Depending on your boss’s priorities, they may put up with the drama because of the contributions you are making, or they may decide that all the trouble you create isn’t worth it.

Some jerks are never going to change, but many of them can. There are oblivious jerks who don’t intend to be offensive but are unaware of their impact. There are situational jerks, like the sales leader who treats customers with great courtesy and then comes back to the office and bullies the support staff. Both of these characters can change, usually with a combination of a good coach and clear consequences.

When a toxic rockstar becomes just a star, that benefits everyone, including the leader in question. So before you fire a jerk, consider whether the person is worth investing in. One of my client companies told me they send their leaders to Gail Golden Consulting for charm school. If you want to help a jerk become more charming, get in touch with us at ggolden@gailgoldenconsulting.com.