Referent Power: How women can build it and wield it
Referent power is just one of many ways a business leader can gain and exercise power. Some ways are heavy-handed. There's positional power, which is, effectively, "I am the boss and you have to do what I say." And there's punishment power, i.e. "If you don’t do what I say, I’ll fire you." Both of these types of power can be effective in specific circumstances, but they don’t work well as long-term business leadership strategies.They especially don’t work well for women. Most people react swiftly to a domineering woman with strong dislike and anger. We expect women in authority to be smart and forceful but also kind and empathic.For women leaders looking to get things done, referent power is usually the best type of power to choose. Referent power is about gaining others’ followership because they respect you. They want your approval and they want to be like you, so they do what you say. Think about the leaders you have worked with who inspired your loyalty and spurred you to do your best. Were you afraid of them? Probably not. Did you admire them and want to please them? You bet.
How women can build and use referent power
If you're struggling to get the support of your team, try following these four tips for building referent power:
Practice what you preach. Don’t expect others to do what you won’t do. Live the values you expect from your team. Treat everyone with respect and courtesy, all the time, no matter what.
Be honest. Keep your team informed. Be frank about what you don’t know. If you make a mistake, admit it and correct it. Never lie.
Earn trust. Do what you say you will do. Defend your team members, and make sure they know when you are sticking up for them. Share credit for wins and take accountability for failures.
Celebrate wins. Give praise and rewards lavishly for a job well done. Praise people publicly (if they like it). Bring fun and celebration into the workplace.
Under the pressure of driving performance in challenging and competitive business environments, many business leaders ignore these management best practices. They place unreasonable expectations on their team members, they are deceptive or unreliable, and they focus more on problems and failures than on successes and wins. These behaviors sometimes gratify a business leader’s own needs to feel powerful in the moment, but they do not build real and lasting power in the way that referent power can.Business leaders do not have to be bullies or egomaniacs to get the job done. True leaders influence their people by deploying a range of powerful tactics — and using their referent power is one of the best tools in their toolboxes.To earn more about building your referent power, email me.
